Forgive and let go


Have you ever been shopping and had to carry heavy bags? your arms start to hurt and you may need to stop a few times to get some rest, you start to feel pain and get tired and frustrated? Well, that’s exactly what holding a grudge does to you mentally, it drains your energy. There will be some of you who will have gone through painful situations where you feel you can never forgive someone or something, no matter what it is that you have been through, you will never have a prosperous happy life if deep down inside you are holding onto resentment! When I was growing up I didn’t have the “ideal family life”, there were lots and lots of arguments between my mother and father, some things were said and done that a child should not have had to witness!  Naturally, these experiences left a huge dent in my self esteem and i suffered with depression and had suicidal thoughts all the time. It created a huge bubble of fear in my life,  I grew up with the belief that I can never experience having a an ideal family life(if there is such a thing) of my own, that all my relationships were destined to end the same way as my parents did, that I shouldn’t love with all my heart because it’s going to be taken away. Although it was a painful experience, i came out the better person because what i went through taught me more about compassion than it did blame, i realized that my parents could only offer me what they had and that everything they gave to me is all they knew and that they too suffered with their inner demons… now am i going to hold that against them? Of course not, they did all they could do and in a way i should be grateful because i came out so much stronger as a person.You will not be the only person who cannot forgive, but how does holding onto hatred toward someone or a situation make you happy or bring joy to you? it won’t in anyway shape or form. If someone has done you wrong, it is still up to you how you will allow that to affect you, people make mistakes and if we constantly judge a person by their past mistake then  we are not allowing the individual to move on from their past situation, we punish them for things that they cannot go back and change, you might as well put that person in a cage and throw away the key… would you like someone to do that to you? constantly reminding you of your wrong doings? of course you don’t, so don’t think you have the right to do that to other people. Help each other grow. Understand, as humans we have all made mistakes and we will continue to do so, it’s part of our personal growth, live and learn. There isn’t one person out there that hasn’t made a mistake that they don’t regret. A painful truth i have accepted is that no matter what good you do, there will always be some people who will never see you for what you truly are, unfortunately there is nothing you can do about other people’s opinion, my advise to you would be, to move on, those people are not here to help you grow. When we refuse to forgive we are allowing the person or a situation to define who we are, now think about that person or the situation and ask yourself ‘ am i going to let this person/situation define me?  Why let someone who means nothing to you affect you? Let go,
Guilt also plays a huge factor in forgiving ourselves, we need to let go of past guilt’s,some things you may have done may seem unforgivable, but you need to allow yourself to let go because guilt will play a huge role in how you do things and what you feel. Let your mistakes  be a lesson and release the limiting thoughts you have of yourself.  it may not be easy but you will get there, every time that negative thought creeps back into your mind quickly let it go, release it and don’t give it air, when you do this and make the letting go part a habit, everything will fall into place and eventually you will be strong enough to control what is running through your mind. Our time is so very precious to waste it on people and thoughts that do not allow us to grow, don’t dwell in self pity, you are only going to harm yourself doing this, get up and affirm to yourself that you are a strong individual who will overcome any obstacles… and YOU WILL.

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